Q. Love kind of leaked out of our Marriage but we enjoy mutual respect and a good working arrangement. But my wife doesn’t think that’s enough.
A. God made Marriage and He made Love for Marriage and Marriage for Love. Since God is Love, Love has little or no meaning without Him. He alone founds, supports and grows love.
Love is as great and as complex as God is. Three words for Love speak of the three kinds of Love He wants in your Marriage:
- Eros, Erotic Love Sensual, romantic, sexual love
- Philia Love Companionship, caring, communicating
- Agape Love God’s kind of unselfish, giving, one sided love
This is the way He designed us for each other. One has to have a relationship with this God of Love to experience His Love, and give and receive Love. Man’s problem (and Woman’s) is that that he loves for benefit. In his selfishness he has lost the reality of True Love and eventually becomes bored with what he receives, or can give, from a declining body and intellect. In fact, he experiences not so much Love, as Lust, which is degrading and unfulfilling.
God intends each of these kinds of love to be in your Marriage.
Love is union in the flesh, our bodies – Erotic Love. Outside of Marriage and God it becomes cheap and short-lived. In Him it lasts a lifetime, despite the aging process we all face.
But Love is more than Eros; it is also Philia; filial, or companionship Love. This brings union in two minds or souls and is bred from consideration and care for each other.
Finally, but which should be primary for any couple, there is God’s kind of unselfish, self-giving love, Agape. In Him two spirits are united in the most wonderful bond of Divine Love.
The union of two spirits, the unionof two mindsand intellects and the union of two bodies, can only become truly effective when God gives Himself and His Love to a couple, and sustains this blessing throughout their lives. Marriage, as God designed it, is the totality of union, body, mind and spirit, in the life of a couple
Which kind of love is the most important? They are equally important and God wants you to have them operating fully in your Marriage. Whichever part you deny is like denying a part of God.